So the other night Boone (one of my oldest and closest friends ever) calls me up and asks if I can come over and help him finish remodeling his bathroom. So I drive out to Arlington, arrive 50 minutes late and we start messing with some plumbing; both of us doing a fine job of pretending like we know what we were doing. After about an hour, having had accomplished what the average capable man would have done in about 15 minutes, we went downstairs and ate dinner.
Afterwards we went outside so Boone could have a cigarette (I know…I know…he’ll die young)…anyways we just sat outside and talked, and laughed, and told old exaggerated stories the way that we remember them happening. It was great…we worked for about an hour total, and then talked for about two and a half….and then I went home. That night was rest for me. I never have to fake it with Boone…ever. I felt rested when I went home that night.
I really can’t say how important it is for me to have those real kinds of friendships in my life. And I mean those real, deep, intimate friends…not my “good buddies”….because everyone has plenty of good buddies.
Gosh, our definition of “friend” nowadays is just stupid. We can have 500 Facebook friends, hundreds of people following us on Twitter, text message 50-500 times per day, and yet still NEVER really communicate with others or be truly known by them. We love keeping people an arms distance away. Close enough to be popular and impressive looking, and still far enough away to be safe. That is the WORST kind of lonely, when you are surrounded by people, and feel completely alone.
‘Safe’ friendships are always boring by the way. I’ve had my share of ‘safe’ relationships. It’s like you’re always having to put on a show for other people, always looking good in front of them, never letting your guard down and letting them in to your life; to see the good and the bad IN us. We can be our own puppets sometimes…just putting on the show for everyone to see…it’s exhausting.
I hope I don’t sound angry or negative right now. It’s just what I’ve noticed. Fight for those relationships….they don’t happen naturally or easily.
Russ,
ReplyDeleteI really liked that comment about how that night was rest and that you never had to fake it with your friend Boone. I can relate to that and I thank God for those real, deep intimate friends, the kind of friends who know us inside and out and still love us. That's kinda like the way Jesus loves us! He knows everything (absolutely everything) about us and still loves us! Amazing! So when I have those kinds of friends in my life, they remind me of Jesus' love for me and I feel rested too. Remember, Jesus said Come unto me, all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you REST!. I am so glad you shared this. It blessed my heart. Thanks, Russ. I also have to agree with your comments about Facebook/Twitter/texting friends and also about 'safe' friends. I think you are dead-on right about that. I didn't think you sounded negative or angry. I just thought you were telling it like it is . . . speaking the truth in love! God bless you!
thanks for sharing Russ! You are speaking the truth!
ReplyDeleteI definitely, definitely agree. This is something that I had a real problem with in the past and it is something that high school heavily promotes.
ReplyDeleteGod bless!
Sarah